Startupcoaching

KFC doesn’t mean Kentucky fried Chicken but can be a nice little formula to get things going in the right dierction

The issue raised here is very important. I totally agree.
But the case study is way off line.

After reading the article, I had to react.

I knew Renée personally, as I do Martin. We are part of the same business bloggers network in Montreal. There is no hint in Martin’s article about what they are talking about. Maybe something got added in the translation….

Renée was very active on social media but probably even more in real life. Living alone at 60, in a foreign country, doing lots of volunteering on the Island, specially at a Veterinarian clinic for stray cats. Besides that she was talking daily very long walks along the beach.

She was a foreign old lady, seen as “rich” by the Islander’s standards (remember she had been travelling back and forth between Isla Mujeres and Montreal for many years) and therefore easily “spotable” for a local looking for quick cash. No need of any social media presence for that.

She was a “people person” in real life just as she was on Social media. She had the knack of starting a conversation with anyone. Well educated and world traveller, she was never short of topics to talk about. Being friendly with people has it’s downside, but by bringing in this debate a “culture of fear” prevalent in the US, they make an exceptional situation sound like a rule.

With such a strong presence online, in social medias, numerous blogs and sites, Renée’s case should inspire SocialMediaToday to focus on the issue of “Digital Legacy” It would be a right way to pay respect to the pioneer of “Digital Nomadism” that she was!

So you are the shy type. You have problems in crowded events. Well, social media to the rescue. Have a simple socialmedia strategy and look at people coming towards you. Much easier , don’t you think ? Besides, being active online greatly maximizes the time you spend networking offline anyway.

It’s the time for Tweetups, Podcamps, Yulbiz, Webcom and all kinds of event when you finally get to meet those people you keep chatting with over Facebook, Twitter, your blog and in some cases LinkedIn. Let”s put this to good use shall we ?

Picture: Besides the fact that it adds to your credibility, one good reason to have a real photo as your avatar is that it makes you easily recognizable.  It happens often in these meetings that someone will look at me kind of funny saying; “You’re Startupcoach aren’t you ? It’s much easier to approach someone when you “know” who he or she is. Use the same avatar everywhere, and use a recent one, just to make sure. Make it easy for people to come up to you.

Participating: “Be” in the conversations. A certain amount of “human-ess” is required online if you want to come out as ‘fun o be with”. I’m always amazed at how quick the conversations pick up when people you meet offline are the ones you’ve been “chatting” with online. The topics are right at hand, some blog post can come to mind, or news about common online friends.  Furthermore, usually people will offer to introduce you to other people in your line of thought, your line of work or your expertise. You network will expand accordingly.

Polarize: As in ‘take a stand”!  Even if some lengthy conversations can take place over the net, some topics can only be discussed in real life. If you take a stand on a particular issue, people will seek you at those events. Can be seen as a double edged sword but at the same time you can’t stand out of the pack by being average. If you don’t like the “talking about the weather ” stuff, that the way to go.

Come on get out there, reach out and…shake someone’s hand

Photo: Eric Baillargeon

Following a good Vlog post by Mark at CoachCommons, I scrambled into my coaching notes to run down a list of the top 10 situations where people experience cognitive dissonance.

Saved that from a book from Dr. David Burns

1. All or nothing: For you, there are good guys and bad guys…
2. Generalizing:You turn that grain of sand into  a great big mountain !
3. Mental filter:You see everything through dark glasses.
4. Shrugging positives: You do great things BUT it’s not worth mentioning, it’s only you…
5. Jumping to conclusion: No fact? Who cares YOU’RE RIGHT! You assume…everything/self fulfilling prophecy
6. Dramatize and minimize: You downplay the great stuff until they look small
7. Emotional reasoning:  HOW you feel is WHAT you are…. You can’t be that bad.you wouldn’t be reading this blog
8. The “should”: Everybody SHOULD do this, do that. No one should “should over themselves” like that!
9. Negative branding: For you or others. One mistake and BANG …HOT-IRON BRANDING
10. Blaming: Here again, it’s you or someone. You always have someone to blame

Do you recognize yourself in one of these situations ?

Remember Toughts lead to Feelings that lead to the Actions that bring Results

If you don’t like the Results you have change the Actions you take!

And if you can’t help but act the way you do, look at the feelings behind the actions…and the thoughts behind the feelings.

Use that list to identify what cognitive dissonance you’ll start correcting RIGHT NOW!

Change some thoughts

You’ll FEEL GOOD about it.

You’ll act accordingly

Ans new results will follow.

As for myself, these days,  I’m guilty of number 4. Now I’ve got to work on those 2 Online programs….

More thoughts about rituals